Men probably won't admit it, but we want love too. Maybe it is because women are supposed to want love above all that men act as though love was not vitally important to them too. But it is. We want to love and be loved for who we are. We want an honest, shared relationship with a woman who we love with all of our hearts and who will love us the same. We want to completely share our lives with the love of our lives.
So if men and women both want the same thing, then what is the problem?
Well, the problems are as many as the stars in the sky. Because, well, people are different. They come at this relationship issue from different experiences and different lives and bring different concerns and worries, wants and needs to this human equation. So maybe she finds it hard to trust others because she's been burned one too many times by untrustworthy men. Maybe he's gun shy about commitment because he's made the commitment before, only to be abandoned by a woman who found something and someone better.
Or maybe the two people are attracted to each other, but simply not compatible. They don't fit and aren't meant for each other. So even though what they want is the same, they aren't talking to each other in the same love language. She may as well speak Greek to a German, for all the good it will do them.
Then again, maybe everything is right and they fit together like the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, they love each other, care for each other deeply, want to spend the rest of their lives together and share so many experiences, likes and dislikes, interests and passions, but something spooks her and she runs away.
It simply is not enough to both want love. It is not enough to care for each other.
Because we all say that we want to love and be loved. We watch romantic movies and cry over lost love, swearing we'd get it right if only we got the chance. We read romance novels and feel empathy with the couple that gets to begin a life together. And we wish we were them.
Until, that is, we get the chance. Then we choose safety and security over love. In fact, we'll opt for anything over love, given the choice, because choosing love is scary. It gives us the chills of fright. Better to live out a life without love than to take the chance. Better to stay put and wish and dream for love than to actually take the risk.
Yes, we all want love. But only when there is nothing to lose. And love is all about risking everything, putting it all on the line, to be with the one we love.
Risking that much, though, is just too much to ask. Isn't it?
